Falling in love is simple. Staying in love, is not so simple. See, a lot of people think that relationships are easy peasy or it has to be perfectly perfect.
The truth is, every relationship has its own difficulties. Even in Disney’s cartoons, there are obstacles that have to be conquered by the prince and princess in order to achieve a happy ending.
Relationships require a lot of mutual understandings and adding fuel is necessary to keep the flame burning passionately between both partners.
Whether you and your partner are struggling to sustain the relationship, or you would like to understand the secret to building a long term relationship, you’re in luck!
We’ve come up with some suggestions to help reaffirm your commitment to your partner, and why you should choose love over defeat!
What are the five love languages?
Firstly, in order to make things work, you have to know your partner well. Find out what his/her love language is. If you don’t know, then try this quiz to find out which category you and your partner fit in!
Understanding each other’s love languages is crucial as it can help prevent conflicts in the future. There are a total of five love languages that we will break down in this article.
Words Of Affirmation
Kind words are priceless yet hold so much value. Words of affirmation is when your partner prefers affection being expressed through praises and appreciative words. Although it may sound easy, having a sincere tone is vital otherwise it would be ineffective.
Some ways you could practice words of affirmation:
- Send a random text and tell your partner how much you love them. Never stop telling them how much they mean to you because it can never be enough!
- When he/she is down, cheer him/her up by giving compliments like how beautiful/handsome they look.
- If your partner ever messes up, encourage them by giving advice on how to improve. Avoid harsh words because it will leave a long-lasting negative impact on your partner that carries this love language!
- A cheeky practice would be to stick notes in random places where she/he can see. Leave messages like “Smile!”, “Have a great day!”, “Can’t wait to see you again!”.
Acts Of Service
Nothing speaks louder than actions. Satisfying your partner who has this language may not always be easy but it’ll definitely be rewarding! You don’t always need grand gestures to satisfy him/her because little things matter too!
Simple ideas of acts of service:
- For those that live under the same roof, you could offer to do additional house chores. This is a very considerable act as not many people enjoy doing housework because they feel it eats too much of their time.
- Prepare a meal for them. If you know your partner goes out early for work, prepare a simple breakfast for them, even a lunch box is perfect to symbolise “I care about you.”
- If you have a family, take the children with you so your partner could hang out with his/her friends without worrying.
- Check if the groceries need to be refilled. Get them before your partner does, or even better, without being asked to!
Quality time is when your partner gets to enjoy time spent with you. Speaking this language can be quite a challenge especially when both sides have a tight schedule with work. Quality time is also a way to show that you prioritize your relationship and that work should not be an excuse to neglect the time with your partner.
Some ideas on how to tackle quality time:
- Being together is good but it could be better if you and your partner spice things up. Instead of the usual netflix and chill at home, take him/her out on a weekly basis for a movie, a meal, or just window shopping, anything with different scenes.
- Do what your partner likes. He likes playing video games? Spend time playing with him. If she likes arts, take her to art galleries. Accepting what your partner likes will help you understand him/her even deeper.
- Take the week off and plan a holiday. Leave the stress and worries behind. While both of you are at it, avoid using electronic devices and give your partner an undivided attention throughout the whole trip.
- Revisit your partner’s childhood. Take him/her for a car ride in the area where he/she grew up. Get your partner to share their childhood memories so you get to know him/her better!
Some people don’t enjoy being touched, and some love it (their body language will tell you). Physical touch is important in a relationship as it displays a sense of security and belonging. We’ve got to add that physical touch isn’t just limited to the bedroom; a hug or a pat works well too for someone who expresses love through touch.
How to show affection through physical touch?
- Holding his/her hands when you’re in public gives your partner assurance about the relationship. It’s a way of manifesting that you belong to him/her.
- Give him/her a good massage occasionally. Massages have been proven to help relax someone both physically and mentally.
- Wrap your arms around your partner. Ladies feel safe when her man does this and vice versa, men feel needed when their lady hugs them firmly (just remember not to suffocate them!).
- Last but not least, do not forget you and your partner’s private time in the bedroom! Uplift the mood with some sassy music and savour the moment with some teasings and foreplay. Remember, rushing into things will only make it end faster!
If receiving gifts is your other half’s love language, then it’s a tricky but manageable one. When we talk about gifts, it’s not just the expensive and luxury things but we would like to emphasise on. Little gifts say a lot as well. A notebook or even chocolate can mean so much to someone who expresses love through gifts!
Even if receiving gifts isn’t your partner’s first love language, gifts are still a good way to let them know they are always in your thoughts!
For receiving gifts lovers:
- Flowers are one of the best things to send to a lady because it has a wide selection that fit any occasions.
- Paying for a meal is considered as gifts too. Keep it simple by asking your partner out to their favourite restaurant and get to know each other deeper over conversations.
- Does your partner treasure his/her car a lot? Offer a wax and polishing service! Maybe the car is dull and looking old already, offer to pay for an interior and exterior refurbishment, we promise they will be very grateful for it!
- Is your partner a music lover? Then get a pair of tickets to a local gig show or any other concerts near you.
- For more creativity, do check out our gift guides for more!
We hope that by now you would have grasped the brief idea of the five love languages and how it plays a role in a relationship.
Relationships will have ups and downs, and we believe things that are challenging will eventually be worth it. #chooselove